Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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