Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Randomize
