Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
