Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
