apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
