You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize