first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
