Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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