he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
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I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
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