the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
should my penis look like a turkey
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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