I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
im about as happy as oj after his trial
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Randomize