i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
