remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
