How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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