I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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