He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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