woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I'm at about main and main street
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize