Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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