Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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