Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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