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it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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