I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
someone owes me an orgasm
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
