Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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