It's Friday. Sex?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
