Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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