Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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