your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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