haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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