Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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