watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
