Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize