Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
