I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
