Got a toothbrush?
...so i touched it.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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