for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
