I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
