the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
