fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The adults are the big ones right?
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