Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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