You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Randomize
