I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
