My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
