How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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