Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?

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(702): View more from Nevada

Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...

(1-702): View more from Nevada

ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha

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(803): View more from South Carolina

i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.

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(714): View more from California

the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.

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(424): View more from California

You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.

(1-424): View more from California

The hell is wrong with me

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels

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(727): View more from Florida

Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.

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