Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
