Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
