I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
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Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
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I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.