Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
