i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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