No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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