Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
