that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
